Posts Tagged ‘two whole cakes’

Fat in love

fat brides

1. File0040, 2. hurrah!, 3. 041_41, 4. Hitched2

Today is the day to celebrate being in love with yourself and your dearest ones! I just found this awesome new flickr pool called “Here come the Fat Brides” and I’m very pleased to see that there are heaps of beautiful fat brides who’ve already contributed.

In the same vein, Lesley from has curated a most adorable Museum of Fat Love. She had initially put the idea out there as an antidote to the US series “More to Love”. Not having seen the series, I’ll have to take it from Lesley that it’s rather depressing. The idea of the Museum of Fat Love is to make visible the notion that fat people can meet, fall in love, and have successful and beautiful relationships. Being in a fat couple myself, I can only support that notion! (Totes biased, yo.)

If you’re part of a fat relationship, do submit a photo and your story to Lesley!

Because of this entry, I crave pastry encrusted twinkies. Mmmm.


Ah, Health. It’s one of those things that, as a fat person, I am often berated about. “Janey, what about your health? Don’t you know being fat is bad?  FOR YOUR HEALTH I MEAN, OBVS, and not the socially imposed stigma that fat is the worst thing in the world.”


First off, if you’re going to give me the health schpiel then you’ll need to back it up with some current research, some hard proof, and/or some studies that aren’t funded by Weight Watchers (or equivalent).  What was that?  It’s well known that fat is unhealthy? Well lemme tell you something, ignorant person. Up until the 1973 being gay was “well known” to be a mental illness in psychiatric circles, and leeches were “well known” to be the best way to cure most ailments well into the 1900s. Always know your facts, sure, but also know that technology advances, and research becomes more sophisticated – particularly with regards to our health. Correlation does not equal proof, and that’s something many people need to realise. On top of that, it’s none of your fucking business if a person is healthy or unhealthy! Stop imposing what you believe to be correct on other people, or I may just have to pelt you with twinkies.


Last week I was given this magazine with an all too knowing look, along with a “maybe you should read this, Janey.”




….Jebus, I’ve been working for a really long time, if that’s the case. I remember being fat when I was four. I’ve seen pictures of me as a baby, I was always a chub. No wonder I want to retire already. The article in question uses the phrase “studies have shown” so many times that it makes my head spin.  Nowhere in the article does it have the name of any studies so I could fact-check.  For all I know these “studies” were arbitrarily made up, given the amount of information I could find about them. The article talks about a number of scenarios that will MAKE YOU FAT including stress and corporate functions. Their solution? That we should try not eating at functions (yes, really) and running around the office when we get a chance (yeah, suuuuure) to stay healthy. Who cares if you look like a total fruitcake, because at least you’ll be thin. Oh, no, i’m sorry, “healthy”.  People who equate less weight with health should take a trip to the anorexia/bulimia ward sometime. What I’m saying here is that thin people can be just as healthy/unhealthy as fat people – and either way it doesn’t fucking matter.


To be honest, I don’t really care that much about the HAES movement. It’s just not my thing. I know I’m probably pissing off people everywhere by saying this, but I don’t care.  More power to you if that’s your shenanigan, everyone should do whatever makes them feel good as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else. But for me? I do not enjoy most conventional exercise. I like eating what I want to eat, when I want to eat it, and cooked in as much butter as I see fit. It irritates the bejeebers out of me that people (both fat and thin) talk about exercising like it’s some magic solution to my socially imposed problems.  It’s difficult for me to express to conflict I feel over this whole issue properly.  On the one hand, I truly deeply hope that some day soon, fat people aren’t judged and ridiculed the way they that they are right now. I hope society begins to realise that fat or thin, you can be healthy. Conversely you can be fat or thin and UNhealthy. I like to think I’m quite happily in that range.  And that’s okay!


More important than health (or lack thereof), I think that regardless of a person’s size, health, sexual orientation, socio-economic status, gender, race or anything else, everyone has the right to live a judgement free life. Everyone deserves to be treated with dignity and respect.  And imposing your beliefs (whatever those may be) on others is a shit sandwich that I refuse to take a bite of. I guess this all comes down to the fact that I don’t give a flying fuck what most people think about my weight, my “health” or my eating habits.  I am the only one who is responsible for my mental or physical well-being, and if someone else tries to take that on then I will tell them to get the fuck out of my shoes. If I want to eat two whole cakes every day with a cask of wine and pastries slathered in butter and cream, it’s my right to choose that. If I don’t want to exercise, I don’t have to ask anyone’s permission.  It’s my life, my body, and I’ll choose to do with it what I see fit. Because frankly, it’s nobody’s business but my own.


So what are your thoughts on this, fats? I occasionally worry that as an ambassador of Fat Acceptance, I’m upholding the stereotype of what many consider fat people to be, thus doing the movement a disservice.  That being said, I’m not willing to change who I am (and who I would be regardless of my size) purely because of what people think I should be doing. Tell me your opinions in the comments!


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