Fuckdammit is an amazing curse.

I love how you turned the thoughtless statement into a major compliment. You're right – you are the sun! That picture is fantastic and absolutely gorgeous!

Ha! I love it!

I love your response to your father and the way you feel about him. You're compassionate, but real. And you love him. Or maybe it's just that I really relate, having felt similarly to my (now, sadly, departed) father.

You are beautiful! And my god, your sister and you look alike (errr, that is your sister, right?)

Yep, that's my sister! We have matching dimples, teehee.

aw, thank you!

never been to this site before. Your dad is clearly blind, because you are gorgeous and should absolutely expect to command many moons. I mean men mooning. That dress is cute as hell, what a kind bride friend you have!

You like radiant like the sun in that picture

i think you are being too generous. the comment sounded to me like fat hat and shaming which to me is unacceptable. that being said I know that relationship with the 'rents is always a challenge, especially when FA is concerned.

Good for you with reframing it to make yourself feel good.

Your father may be sweet, but his comment was ignorant and hateful at its core.

My dad is many things, but sweet is not one of them, I can assure you! Look, I know he's a bit of a bastard, but with him it's really a matter of picking my battles if I ever want him to grasp the concept of fat acceptance. He's not there yet (as is evidenced by his comment) but I wont give up on him; he's my dad after all. Most people have someone like him in their lives, but his good points do outweigh his bad.

He has, as many people have, grown up in a society where mocking fat is perfectly acceptable. I am slowly but surely educating him to the size acceptance movement, but water won't wear down a stone in one day. Changing ingrained attitudes takes time and patience, and he's worth it for me.

I'm sorry that your parents are so ingrained in their way of thinking that they refuse to listen to you – for me it's an uphill battle because my family often sees me as a defensive fatty who is trying to justify being lazy.

Truth is, I am lazy. But nobody should be treated cruelly just because they're lazy, and the more i talk about it the better my family is. As you can see from the photo, my sister (the bride) is pretty much the size that most of my relatives are, so they have an inherent thin privilege. At least when i talk to them about the issues they listen and digest my point of view, though. Sometimes it's even been good for me to get their opinions, because they can bring to light things I haven't thought of. In the end though, it's because they are willing to listen that I am willing to talk, and I am sorry you don't have that with your family.

As far as your parents go, even if they are coming from a place of love it's a pity they can't do it without being disrespectful. I guess that's the beauty of friendships though – they're the family you get to choose, right?

And I've failed the “your” “you're” test. I need to go back to bed.

Peace,
Shannon

That is a stunning photo.. and a gorgeous dress!

I think this is a great example of how to turn things around for yourself.. we can't control what other people say/think in many cases.. and we can't just cut EVERYONE who says something thoughtless/hurtful out of our lives… but we CAN decide how we're going to process and react to such comments.. this is a fantastic example of that.

This is really off the subject, but that is a lovely dress. If I ever get married my dress is going to look like that, only floor length and a colour other than red.

Shit, my laptop, messing up the senteces… What I meant to say: Thank you very much for this post, I feel like it's given me the strength to recognise the world through my own eyes, not the eyes of other people, or this culture.