Omega

Welcome to my world..

Thu, 23/07/2009 - 10:17pm | by

Well hell-oooo Axis of Fat!

I’m Omega. Yeah, as in Ω ..

I’m a goth. I’m a steampunk. I’m a DJ. I’m a feminist. I’m a mother. I’m a geek. I’m poly.

Oh – and I’m fat.

I have been gifted by the fates with a classic hourglass figure. Regardless of my weight, my waist is always 10-15 inches smaller than my bust and hips, which are always the same size. It was true when I was a size 8, it was true when I was a size 20, and it’s true now, when I am a size 16.[img_assist|nid=56|title=Omega, being a poser despite the signs..|desc=|link=none|align=right|width=243|height=324]

I have bright, bright, BRIGHT red hair. It’s been this way well over a decade. A lot less people freak out and point since I moved to Melbourne from Brisbane a year ago.

I have two amazing partners, and a wonderful nearly-teenage daughter, and a cat, and two rabbits, and a vege garden… I have a job in Communications that I enjoy, and I have enough hobbies to sink a battleship. My world is filled with love and laughter. Life is good.

And that’s exactly the mantra I was repeating to myself while listening to two of my co-workers talk about me. Our office bathroom is right next to the tea-room. You can hear through the wall. They didn’t realise I was in there.. and were saying..

(for clarity, let’s call them Office Bimbo 1 & 2.)

OB1 = Omega’s jacket is nice.

OB2 = Yeah.

OB1 = It’s such a shame. She obviously spends a lot of time on her appearance. But still she’s just..

OB2 = Fat?

OB1 = Yeah. I mean, no matter what she does, you know…

OB2 = Yeah. I know. I’d rather die than be fat.

OB1 = Yeah, me too.

Now I’d like to be able to tell you that I burst out of the ladies loo, enjoying their stunned mortification for a moment, and then said something blistering and witty and wonderful that rocked their skinny little bodies back against the wall with its sheer awesomeness.. and then I sauntered my sassy large ass right out of there with a triumphant wiggle.

But.. I didn’t. I just sat there. Till they went back to their desks. And then I went back to mine.

I have to work with them, you see. And – as much as their opinion annoys me, they have a right to it. No matter how stupid and ignorant it is, they’re entitled to it. I mean, I’d rather DIE than be that stupid, know what I am saying?

But gaaah.. they’d rather DIE than look like me? That’s pretty harsh.

Can you blame them, though? I mean, the range of “acceptable” if you listen to our media is pretty slim. narrow. not much wriggle room. (ha – see what I did there?)

Take this for example. This ad is currently holding pride-of-place on a huuuuuge billboard outside Flinders St station at the moment. I have seen it on buses and plenty of other places too. It’s for Kayser Lingere..

It’s selling underwear for different shapes of women. Great idea! But the models they have chosen…

Well, look for yourself:

[img_assist|nid=51|title=Kayser ad - pear|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=140|height=193]

[img_assist|nid=52|title=Kayser ad - hourglass|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=140|height=192]

[img_assist|nid=50|title=Kayser ad - column|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=141|height=194]

[img_assist|nid=49|title=Kayser ad - apple|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=141|height=191]

Now.. if you are anything like me – you will ask yourself.. are these the same girl?? (I dont think so..but they are so similar, it’s hard to tell)  Is this photoshopped? (to within an inch of its life).. why oh why do people still think it’s okay to chop off the heads/faces of people in ads?!?

Their slogan? Perfect Fit. Whatever your size. (so long as it’s not more than an 18, or you’re fresh out of luck.) Sorry. I added that last bit myself. Told you I worked in Communications.

Don’t get me wrong. These women are gorgeous. Toned and terrific, every one. And now that the pixel wizards have waved their wand.. utterly flawless… but they are very, very similar. There are as many variations of smaller women as there are of bigger ones. Why, then, did Kayser choose these four, almost indistinguishable models when demonstrating different shapes?

Thank heavens they ‘shopped in cute little props to signify what “shape” they are meant to be, because otherwise I would find it very hard to tell.

Is it any wonder that young women would “rather die” than deviate from this “norm?” Not that is the norm anywhere outside the magazine ads. and the billboards. and the bus ads. Is this the message we want to be sending?

All right, let’s look what our friends at Kayser have to say about MY shape. The aforementioned hourglass. Here’s the description from their website. The brackets are mine.

THE HOURGLASS SHAPE

The hourglass woman is considered the most feminie. With an ample bust and bottom she attracts a lot of attention. The hourglass woman must make the most of her curves, which are in all the right places.

(Now that doesn’t sound so bad, does it.. no siree!)

ARE YOU AN HOURGLASS?

Think tiny waist, voluptuous hips & generous thighs….

(In what alternate reality could the model they have chosen be described as “voluptuous”. We fatties have been using that word to avoid THE EFF WORD for years. And generous? If this is their idea of “generous” I wouldn’t want to work there come Xmas bonus time, that’s for sure…)

…..the shape that most women want to be.

(Really? Can someone tell the girls in my office that, please??)

 

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  • http://zaftigchicks.wordpress.com/ Bianca

    Honey, I’d be happy to tell your co-workers quite a few things for you, and several for myself, right after I removed my 4 inch stilettos from their ass.

    Although, that would be a waste of a good pair of shoes.

  • shorofsky

    My goodness, that's a stinky ad… I teach communications and am trying my best to teach my students to not try and sell something using a thing it is not. In this case, a woman who's not really voluptuous or curvy to represent an hour glass figure… I'd prolly give the ad an F if it were made by a student in my class.

  • Geogrrl

    I agree with you that the ad is idiotic. I think the people who created it are so used to looking at a certain body type they just don't see how ridiculous the ad really is. The same thing can happen when they have their collective heads too far up their collective arses.

    I likely would have confronted the co-workers, but I'm like that. Partly because I DO have to work with them, and I just think they should know what's what. When they got out of the washroom I would have told them that anyone standing in the tea room can hear everything that is said by those in the washroom. Because of the timing I might let it rest there and allow the horror to slowly dawn, or I might also make the comment that they shouldn't make any remarks about co-workers–particularly me–where they can be overheard. It's rude and not appreciated.

  • cerebrate

    Yeah, I'd care a bit more about what you have to say if you weren't using misogynistic language like “bimbo”. I quit reading when I got to that.

  • http://lolitaofmoderntimes.blogspot.com/ lolitaofmoderntimes

    I'm also lucky enough to have a hourglass shape, and sometimes, when I look at some plus size clothes, I wonder if they don't expect all curvy women to look like a cube…

    Anyways… the underwear ad is crap, 'guess we all agree…. The only different shape the girls present is in their position… nothing more, nothing else…

    Cheers,

    Sarah
    ~ Lolita of modern times ~

  • Lena

    I blame Maggie T for the state of fat fashion in Australia today. Once she stopped modelling and put on a bit of weight, she became so alarmed by her body that apparently the only thing to do was to cover it up with vast swathes of fabric constructed into boxy shapes. Now if you like that look, that's great, but oranges are not the only fruit. And every other fatshop seems to have been scavenging in the Maggie T design room dumpster for ideas, with the exception of City Chic. Argh!

  • http://www.definatalie.com definatalie

    Some of the Axis writers haven't been involved in the fat-o-sphere before, and as such may not have awareness that certain language can be hurtful. This is a group blog for Australians who haven't had a voice before, because we haven't had the benefit of exposure to the FA world like many other people have.

    We ask our readers with more experience to be gentle, and if one of our writers does use problematic language please bring it up – but don't be a jerk about it. It took a lot of guts for Omega to write this post, and I'm absolutely certain she is open to learning and growing.

  • Omega

    Point taken. What would be your suggestion for a humorous term used to describe silly, airheaded women?

  • Omega

    Point taken. What would be your suggestion for a humorous term used to describe silly, airheaded women?

  • Omega

    I just noticed. Kayser can't spell Feminine. Is anyone surprised??

  • Ankylosaurus

    How about airhead?

  • monimc

    Heh. The “apple” looks like she drank a lot of water and stuck out her stomach for the photo. (Poking fun at the wrongheaded advertisers, not the lovely model.)

    BTW, I'm in California and read the FatOSphere feed all the time, and love how you Aussies have livened things up!

  • bri_fatlotofgood

    Great to hear from another Aussie! I think your look rocks I dabble in goth and 50s retro/rockabilly myself and I stand out like a sore thumb in the rural area I hail from! Nice to hear from someone else into all the alternative stuff, you wouldnt happen to be a pagan too would you?

  • http://fatheffalump.blogspot.com/ Kath

    While those “office bimbos” do have the right to hold that opinion, that doesn't mean anyone has to take that opinion seriously. Or like them as people. Because as far as I am concerned, a good person doesn't need to denigrate others to make themselves feel better. It makes them very, very sad I feel.

    I'm not sure I would have spoken up in the bathroom either, but I think with time I'd have firmly but politely made sure they knew I heard them. I think sometimes people need to be respectfully reminded that their attitudes are hurtful to others, and to at least use a little discretion.

  • fall_from_grace

    Hmm, I'd love to know what 'shape' I am. I *think* I'm an hourglass because I have broad shoulders and hips and my stomach dips in abruptly but I'm also a bit of a pear.

    Anyway I love talking about body shapes as I find it a lot more constructive than talking about size or weight – also dressing for your shape and not your size is one of the key components of looking fancy in my opinion. So thanks for a great article and I'd also picked up on the uniform body shapes of the model in that Ad :)

  • OrangeAlli

    First off – You, Omega, are gorgeous! What a shape!
    Second, those models are unreal (literally!). The poor apple girl looks like she's trying way to hard.

    I just stumbled on this site. I'm from the US, and where I am is no different. I get looks from skinny college girls all the time, and I just want to lean over and say, “I looked just like you when I was 19. Look what 10 years got me!”

    Great job, the lot of you writing here!