I also don’t think the way to reclaim the word “fat” is by calling other people fat. It’s about being proud to call yourself fat. That’s how you de-stigmatize a label. (A perfect example is the c-word. I may think there’s nothing wrong with the word “c-nt,” but that doesn’t mean I should go around calling people that willy nilly.)

Context is important. I was called “Bangla” as a pejorative growing up – “you dirty Bangla get out of this country”. But “Joy Bangla” was also the rallying cry for Bangladesh's independence. The context made all the difference – and in this case it was very obvious that Mars defined “fat” as a positive term. There's no point having an argument when you won't even agree on the definitions – it just becomes Attack of the Strawmen. Your definition isn't the world's definition – that goes BOTH ways. By reacting the way she did, instead of carefully considering the word “fat” and what Mars was trying to say, she is ENCOURAGING the use of it as an insult, which further demonises fat people.

Mars has been taking this rather well, considering the viciousness Marie and her commentors are showing to her on both blogs. People are pointing out comments and calling Mars a “real Mother Theresa!” as an insult! And neither Marie nor any of her supporters are saying “hey, that isn't cool, chill out a bit.”. What could have been just a quickly-sorted misunderstanding became a way to attack someone who may not have had enough syncophants to back her up.

now i don't think they had to go on mega attack mode with that other blogger since she did apologize and all that but i do think having an argumento…well it just ain't chill babes..it just ain't chill. let's squash the beef cause we are all female and we have to support each other with the blogging and our thoughts and ideeears.

much love, dendoo // a faboulously skinny ain't gats no booty black girl who supports all

I wanted to address the negative approach to bodies that so many people have, and I am much more staunch about it than a lot of people because I feel quite comfortable taking the hard line.

I think it's important to accept we are flawed and mistakey, I really like that phrase

But I think that we can't assume that everyone is okay with the word 'fat' just because the 'Fat Friday' writer is.

I mean, I call my partner 'arse-crack' sometimes, as a term of endearment – but I wouldn't go having 'Arse-Crack Sunday' on my blog… With photos of other people I don't know, but whom I find endearing…. They might not share my terminology.

I think we need to be careful, I guess, of hurting other people's feelings. Especially people we don't even know, just for the sake of a blog post, however celebratory.

And I think maybe just celebrate beauty and style and smarts – regardless of shape, colour etc? And remember to be nice to other girls and try to understand them. Usually they are just a bit flawed and human and mistakey like me.